Sour Words That Cut

Shhh… our secret weapon at church! People wonder why our kids are so quiet? CANDY! They get a piece if they make it to sermon (participating and singing), and can sit quietly and take notes/draw pictures of sermon dicussion.

My children have a set of CDs by Steven Green. They are terrific Scriptures, set to music in song format. When my oldest kids were little, we played them over… and over… and over. They worked well for my husband I also! We still listen to them now, just not as much with a greater selection of CDs available.

One of my favorite songs was based on 1 Thess. 5:11… “Encourage one another… and build each other up! Build each other up! Build each other UP!” and it also talked about NOT “tearing each other down… down, down, down!” Good for children to learn opposites, and to understand (at an early age) that if you’re tearing someone down, you’re NOT building them up, like God has instructed us to do!

Well, I’ve been a little under the weather lately. I know part of it is the auto immune side of celiac disease, and I’m just more prone to certain things. In college, under stress – I’d have pink eye for months, yeast infections for weeks, and reoccurring UTIs as well. During pregnancy I’d have months with sore throats, and I’ve always had mouth sores that were totally stress related… not to mention sinus infection after sinus infection with no real help other than an impending surgery “some time in my future.” Frustrating as it was, now that I can understand the WHY I get (and stay) sick like that – it’s less stressful to me, because I know I’m trying my hardest to be healthy, and it’s how God made me. I can’t always manage the stress around me, or on my body.

Thankfully, I’ve had a group of people in my life checking on me – and encouraging me when I wasn’t feeling so hot. My friends and family have checked in with me often. It’s nice to know we’re loved, and it’s so easy to make a choice to make someone feel loved – vs. forgotten, or unimportant.

I read some where on Facebook that we can make an effort to bless our “friends” {yes, on Facebook as well!} – just by liking their picture, their status, or commenting on their wall – to let them know they’re thought of. Little things do really matter.

Think of the last time someone sent you a little note in the mail, for no reason at all. Didn’t that make you feel loved?

On the flip side, the words we say can sometimes unintentionally hurt others too. They can hurt people in passing, and even online – though we must remember there are REAL people, with REAL feelings on the other side of that computer screen.

Even on the phone the other day… I spoke with a Christian lady about our new diet… I made some comment about how many of my GI symptoms of celiac were eliminated when pregnant… and how I (jokingly) wished I could just always be pregnant. To which she remarked, “Oh you wouldn’t want to bring ONE MORE child into this world with celiac disease.”

OUCH.

That really hurt.

Now, she probably didn’t mean it that way that it felt… but in my mind I was a little tongue-tied after that.

My heart sank, and my eyes filled up with tears.

Did I do something wrong? I don’t remember choosing this for myself, OR my kids?

All I could think was words of Truth: God made me. God made my children. He had a purpose in all of this. While celiac disease is extremely serious and life-long commitment to be healthy and it can obviously be life threatening if left unattended… I don’t feel it has to be a death sentence.

I simply don’t regret being open to having 8 kids, no matter how much I tease my husband, “Why wasn’t 2 enough?” Celiac disease, or NOT.

Although I’m not good at expressing when I’m hurting always… I know those jabs affect me, and in turn, they effect my immune system – because I internalize a lot.

Years ago, my Dr. suggested I avoid super stressful situations when possibly – because we realized it did tie into my immune system and digestive system. How we missed celiac disease is clearly a mystery.

Anyway, after that, my husband and I made a point to avoid things that were super stressful, if possible. I was never good at dealing with issues, or confronting problems, and he is even worse (if that’s possible!) It was only through God – who showed me what a sin it was to keep things in, and leave problems unresolved… that I learned to attempt to talk about things face to face with people, and do my part to “be at peace with everyone…”

In the case of this person’s comment, and others like her, I choose to forgive their words… and move on. I’m thankful for His Truth that is in me, and allows me to re-adjust myself after a verbal slap, such as that one.

She may never realize how what she said unintentionally made me feel, and I’m certain I’ve done the same to others in my lifetime. We ALL say things we regret. Grace to ourselves from Him – and always – grace to others through Him.

Peace be with you! See who you can build UP today.

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”

1 Thess. 5:11

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Posted on May 27, 2012, in Celiac/Gluten Sensitivity, Change, Our Struggles. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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